Never Go To Another Brah’s Party Empty Handed

This is an important one. So, listen up, brahs. Getting invited to parties is an integral part of any brah’s life. On any given night of the week, there are multitudes of keg parties, pool parties, frat parties, house parties, graffiti parties, and foam parties just waiting to be honored by your mere presence. And, as a brah, partying most likely accounts for a good twenty to fifty-five percent of your life. Therefore, it is crucial that you get on board with one of the most crucial pillars of the brah code.

Say it after me, brah. A brah must never show up at another brah’s party without at least one unit of community alcohol. Now, I’m not saying that you must keep the entire party flowing with McCormick’s orange-flavored vodka all night. Nor, am I saying that you must even present enough alcohol to sustain a personal buzz throughout the duration of the party. But, what you must not do… What you must never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever do…is show up to another brah’s party thirsty and empty handed. Brah code dictates that you simply immolate a fair quantity of alcohol to pay respect to your host. This not only shows your appreciation for having been selected to attend the party but, in the unlikely event that you have not been extended an invitation, a six pack of Keystone light goes a long way when attempting to commingle up to a complete stranger’s keg. Now, you got this brah.

7 Comments… add one
Nova Button July 11, 2013, 11:29 am

Those Keith stone commercials were the best!

Dionna Zwelner July 11, 2013, 6:13 pm

I’d totally f*ck Keith Stone!

Cori O. July 11, 2013, 4:07 pm

The name is Keith Stone! automatically invited to all my parties with or without alcohol!

Carmel K. July 11, 2013, 5:03 pm

bullshit. if you invite me to your party then provide me drinks.

Billy Hecht July 11, 2013, 5:14 pm

Depends on if you know the host…

tacowrecker July 12, 2013, 8:13 pm

F that. I drink the host’s beer!

The Sir July 13, 2013, 1:56 pm

I always go to parties with a bit of my own alcohol. Unfortunately for the host, it’s usually already pumping through my blood stream!


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